Are your parents getting older? If so, are you worried about whether they have an effective estate plan in place? It’s a concern that many adult children have for their aging parents given that an estate plan not only affects the distribution of one’s assets, but also how their medical and financial decisions will be made if they become incapacitated.
But if your parents haven’t created an estate plan, how can you go about getting them active in creating one? Let’s take a look.
Tips for talking to your parents about estate planning
There are several ways to discuss estate planning with your parents. Here are some tips that you might find helpful as you broach the topic:
- Tell your family members about your intentions: Even though your heart is in the right place, you don’t want to give the perception that you’ve unduly influenced your parents to leave assets to you, as this can set the stage for an estate contest that’s costly and harmful to familial relationships. So, make sure you discuss your intentions with other family members. They may even be willing and able to help you facilitate the conversation with your parents.
- Find an in: It can be awkward to bring estate planning up out of nowhere, especially given that it forces your parents to think about their own mortality. So, look for a way to ease into the conversation. News stories, accounts from family members and friends, and even something that your parents have said can open the door enough to slide into the conversation without making your parents too uncomfortable.
- Focus on their values: When you discuss estate planning, the focus should be on goals and values. So, as you start this conversation with your parents, consider what’s important to them and focus on how estate planning might be able to help them reach their goals and support the people and causes that are important to them.
- Be patient: You shouldn’t rush through a discussion about estate planning. Instead, anticipate that it’s going to take several smaller conversations to get through the topic and get your parents to a point where they’re ready to take the next steps toward creating a formal estate plan.
- Take notes: You should carefully listen to your parents and take notes on what they say. That way you can revisit certain topics and provide clarity as to what they want out of the process. This will give them a strong jumping off point once they make the move to create their formal estate plan.
- Be thorough: Estate planning encompasses a lot. You don’t want your parents to look over something important, like a power of attorney or healthcare directive, so make sure you help your parents understand the breadth of the estate planning process and the benefit of addressing all issues now.
Help your parents implement the estate planning protections that they want and need
If your parents don’t create an effective estate plan, then their assets could be subjected to the state’s intestate succession laws, which means that their assets could fall into the hands of those they don’t want to inherit. This can also be more costly for the estate, as everything will have to go through the probate process. You can help your parents avoid that sort of outcome, though, by engaging in a thorough and thoughtful discussion about their wants, their goals, and how the estate planning process can help them achieve them. So, now is the time to act to get your parents on course to start the estate planning process.
