How to reduce family conflict over your estate plan

On Behalf of | Oct 7, 2024 | Estate Planning And Administration |

Much of the estate planning process is focused on leaving assets to loved ones and charitable causes that you believe in. While that process may give you a sense of comfort since you’ll know that those you care about will be taken care of, the process can end up creating tension and conflict if you’re not careful.

Without a proper estate plan in place, your loved ones may end up fighting over your health care and financial decisions, your end-of-life planning and how your assets should be distributed. This familial infighting can destroy relationships and create rifts among segments of your loved ones.

If you want your estate plan to bring comfort to your family, then you need to work to avoid a contentious situation that can blow up in probate court. All too often, people create their estate plan in secret, leaving their loved ones surprised when they learn of the estate planner’s true intentions. So, with the rest of this post, we want to look at some ways that you can reduce the risk of family contention related to your estate plan.

You might be uncomfortable working on your estate plan and talking about it, but you have to be proactive to secure the plan you want and need while reducing the risk of familial conflict. Here are some ways to do that:

  • Clearly communicate your intentions: One way to reduce conflict is to advise your loved ones of your intentions early on. By doing so, you set realistic expectations and you reduce the chances that your loved ones will be taken by surprise when your estate plan is read out loud. We know it can be uncomfortable to talk about your final arrangements and end of life care, but you shouldn’t shy away from discussing these issues.
  • Create an inventory: It’s unlikely that your estate planning documents will address every asset you own. But you can better specify who gets what by gaining a clear understanding of what you actually own. Creating an inventory can help here, and it can guide you when you think about who you want to inherit certain pieces of personal property.
  • Create a health care directive and a power of attorney: A lot of family conflict arises over health care and financial decisions that have to be made when an individual becomes incapacitated. But you can take at least some of the guesswork out of their decision making by creating legal documentation that names an individual to make those decisions on your behalf. You can then have conversations with this individual and document what sort of care and financial decisions you want them to make should the need arise. This can give you peace of mind and prevent your loved ones from fighting over your care.
  • Use a letter of instruction: This document spells out the intent behind your estate plan and dictates how you want your final arrangements to play out. The clearer you are with your letter of instruction, the more likely you are to reduce conflict amongst your family members.

Effectively create the estate plan that you want and need

Some people make the mistake of thinking that the estate planning process is simple. Others make the mistake of thinking it’s too difficult. While it’s true that estate planning can be nuanced, it isn’t a process that you should shy away from. Instead, you should diligently work to develop a plan that gives you peace of mind and provides for your loved ones as you see fit.

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